Donkey Kong Bananza Nintendo Finally Made a Banger

nintendo woke up and chose violence (and bananas) 🍌

okay, let’s be real. when nintendo announced Donkey Kong Bananza, my expectations were firmly on the floor. another 3D platformer from the big N? groundbreaking. i was fully prepared for a mid, nostalgia-bait cash grab. but listen. i’ve clocked the hours, the reviews are screaming, and i have to report that nintendo… might’ve actually popped off with this one. your wallet is already crying about the Switch 2, and this is not going to help.

this isn’t just another jungle romp. developed by the same masterminds behind Super Mario Odyssey, this game feels less like a sequel and more like its chaotic, slightly unhinged cousin. the core design philosophy is there-huge, open-ended levels stuffed with collectibles-but with a key difference: you can, and are encouraged to, absolutely wreck the place. say less.

So What’s the Vibe? Destruction, Mostly.

the main gimmick here is “destruction-based platforming,” which is just a fancy way of saying Donkey Kong can punch literally everything. tired of a wall being in your way? punch it into dust. need a bridge? tear a pillar down and walk across it. the world is your destructible oyster, and it makes for some legit brilliant puzzle-solving and exploration. it’s the kind of expressive, freeform movement that makes you feel like a genius, even when you’re just causing problems on purpose.

DK’s moveset is all about that brute strength. he can punch, roll, and ground-pound with enough force to shatter the terrain around him. honestly, after playing this, going back to other platformers feels… strangely polite? why open a door when you can just make a new one?

Pauline Inserted Herself Into the Narrative

and get this-Pauline is here. yes, that Pauline. she’s a playable sidekick, and her main ability is singing to reveal waypoints to collectibles. not me seeing her reduced to a walking, talking map marker, but her abilities are genuinely useful for not losing your mind trying to find every last Banandium Gem. there’s even a two-player co-op mode where someone can control her singing projectiles. it’s pure clown behavior, and i’m kinda here for it.

the game is also packed with weird and wonderful power-ups called “Bananza” transformations. the “Zebra Bananza” gives you a speed boost, and the “Ostrich Bananza” lets you glide. it’s exactly the kind of unhinged creativity we’ve been missing.

Is It *Actually* a Masterpiece, Tho? 🧐

the critics are losing their minds over this game. IGN gave it a 10/10, calling it a “masterpiece” and a “brilliant successor to Super Mario Odyssey.” other outlets are praising its chaotic fun and fresh take on the genre. and yeah, they’re not wrong. the game is a blast, a true system-seller for the Switch 2.

but let’s get to the tea. does it run perfectly? lmao, of course not. when the action gets wild and you’re leveling an entire temple, the framerate on the Switch 2 has a little cry. it’s not game-breaking, but it’s there. honestly? it feels like a worthy trade-off for how ambitious the destruction physics are. if your console isn’t audibly wheezing, are you even pushing its limits?

So, Should You Buy It?

look, is Donkey Kong Bananza the one game that justifies the price of a brand-new Switch 2? my inner broke gamer wants to say no, protect your savings, live your life. but my heart, the part that just spent hours gleefully smashing everything in sight, knows the truth.

this is the first certified banger for the new console. it’s a massive, creative, and ridiculously fun adventure that finally gives Donkey Kong the modern 3D platformer he deserves. your FOMO is real, and this time, it’s justified. nintendo, you win this round. 🙄